It's been a while. Time for an update

What can I say?  I've been lazy and haven't kept up with this blog.  But I've had some people wondering lately how things are going, so I decided to take some time today and catch everyone up with what's been going on.  Oh life... I can't even begin to tell you how crazy the last few months have been.  Physically, i'm doing really well.  After the surgery, June 3rd, to deal with an infection on the right breast, everything went smoothly.  Although I was lopsided for a little bit before they could catch the expansions up, everything is evened up now.  I currently have 500 cc's in each breast.  The implants will be about 450 cc's, but they have to stretch the skin further than the expansion.  I went to see Dr.Ross last week to talk to him about the final surgery, scheduled for Friday September 23rd.  To be quite honest, we didn't even talk much about the surgery, all I basically said was "please just make my boobs look nice"  and that was it.  The rest of the time at the appointment was spent talking to nurses, nurse practitioners, & social workers about the rest of the stuff going on in my life.

When I first started this blog, I wrote something about being "happily married."  Well, all these months later, and Scott & I are separated.  It's hard to say when things went wrong, but people just handle things differently, and well, eventually we decide we need emotional support.   Five years ago when I learned of my BRCA2 diganosis, Scott was not there with me.  I saw surgeons & specialists all through the years, had multiple tests done and never once did he offer to come with me.   I remember sitting there in the waiting room, watching all the woman with their spouses/partners and thinking I was so strong to be there alone.  But inside I wanted so bad for him to be there.  On the occasion he did offer to come, there was always some complaint about having to take time off work, or driving the car to London and it was just easier to go alone, and not listen to the complaints.  I have been strong for myself and others for so long, and for once, I wanted someone to be strong for me.  I went through this surgery to give myself a chance at a longer life.  Not just for myself, but for my family.  For my husband, and for our future children. For the first time, Bevin was doing something for me, and yet, it was still for others.  That's just who I am.  I've learned a lot going through all of this though, and i'm still learning about the person I want to be.

I'm working at starting a group in Canada called FORCE (Facing our risk of Cancer empowered).  It's for women who are at a predisposition to Cancer because of a hereditary or genetic link.  I found the group after my first surgery when I was looking to find women to talk to, and now I'm going to start the group in Sarnia to meet other women going through the same thing.  I met with the breast cancer society last week, and they are going to provide the space for our meetings.  The first meeting will be held on October 26th, to teach people a little bit about Cancer genetics and share my story.  From there, it will be a support group for women who are BRCA carriers and we can share all of our stories.  I'm so excited to start the group and to meet other people that have gone through this same journey or who are considering this surgery.  It is in times that I am at my weakest that I am strongest for others, and I really hope that sharing my story and starting this group, empowers other women to learn about genetic risk factors.

Buckingham Fountain, Chicago

Although I've been really stressed out with everything going on, I have had a really fun summer.  I worked with Blackburn Radio again as a Summer Patroller, saw some Tiger games with my buddy Trevor & even caught a Chicago Cubs game in Chicago. I've made some great memories this summer with some great friends and now skating season is starting up again.  Unfortunately, I won't be able to do synchro this year because I just don't have the money, and the weekly trips to Chatham add up, but i'm back in Mooretown coaching.   Once my surgery is over, and I am healthy again, i'm going to start looking for full time work.  At this point, I really have nothing keeping me in Sarnia, so i've been looking everywhere for jobs.  Considering I have dual citizenship, I can also go work in the USA. Really my options are endless, so we will see where I end up.  I've got a whole life to live now, and having done this surgery, I am hoping I've given myself even a longer chance at life.

Johnny, Matt & I on Summer Patrol

I don't regret doing this surgery for anything, it was the best decision I could have ever made for myself.  Yes the timing of it all wasn't right, but then again, a Cancer diagnosis at any time wouldn't be good either.  I'm proud of myself for what I did, and I can't look back.  And I'll use this phrase to end this blog entry, "Today is the first day of the rest of my life."

My buddy Trevor & I at a Detroit Tigers Game.

Everyone needs a friend like him